The Wall

"The wall. We all know it. Anyone who has ever attempted something difficult has hit it. The question is, when we regain consciousness, do we scale the wall to see what's on the other side? God help me to climb this wall!"

That was my Facebook status a while ago and since then I've been doing a lot of mediating on that idea. Here are some of my thoughts:

1. There is no wall that can truly impede us from doing the work that God would have us do.

"he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Phil. 1:6

The only thing that stands in our way is our own lack of faith. In some cases, God asks us to climb "the wall"; in others, He just tells us to walk around it until it falls down. (Heb. 11:30) Either way, God is never stopped.

2. What’s on the other side of the wall? If you don’t climb it, you can’t know. Can’t go under it, can’t go around it, can’t go through it. Gotta go over it! J

3. The great thing about climbing the wall is that we do it in God’s strength, not ours. We don’t have to worry about whether or not we have the strength to make it. It’s like walking on water. We need to fix our eyes on Christ and just put one foot in front of the other. He’ll do the rest. The reason I think that so many of us struggle with this so much is that climbing the wall means always being at the end of ourselves and dependent upon God. Nice in theory, hard in practice. We prefer to be in control of every situation we face and resent the need to depend on someone else, be outside of our comfort zones, or not have an answer.

4. Still, I thank God that during the climb He gives us landings on which to rest and observe the view. For me, one such landing in the midst of an arduous climb was a prayer retreat that I went on a few weeks ago with Spearhead. The passage that God kept whispering to my heart was Psalm 23:1-3 The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside still waters, He restores my soul…” I found that there are times during the climb that I get just totally exhausted. In those times (so far) God has carried me in one of two ways. He has either said, “My strength is made perfect in your weakness, now see what I will do," and has carried me. Or, He has drawn me away from the noise of the battle and spoken softly to me, restoring me soul and refreshing me to continue the upward journey.

5. On the same prayer retreat, our team climbed a mountain and my sage friend Jonathan observed, “The farther up you climb, the better the view is.” I am going to steal that comment for my argument. The farther you climb the barrier that is blocking your path, the better the view is of God’s faithfulness in the past, and the more you can see the complete picture of the struggle you’re going through and how it fits into God’s plan. Now granted this view is hard to see when you’re in the actual process of the ascent with sweat in your eyes and straining with all your might. The view comes when God gives times to rest and reflect on what He has done and where He has brought you.

All I Want for Christmas...

So it's only October, but for most people, Christmas shopping is at least in the back of their minds, if they aren't doing it already. Do you ever wonder why we do all this shopping? Is it to make people love us more? Is it because we feel like what we culturally need to do?



I know so many people who dread the Christmas season. It is pure stress to them. Honestly, many of the people I know who love Christmas don't even love it for the right reasons. It is all an eleborate show. The snow, the presents, the food, the music, the chestnuts roasing on an open fire, etc. Those who play it right glory in their finesse, and those who find it to be unsatisfying grit their teeth till it's over.

Advent Conspiracy is a movement of Christians who are trying to redeem this season. Their motto is to "Worship fully, spend less, give more, love all." There is a ton of information on their website (http://www.adventconspiracy.org/) but I think I'll give a little bit of my personal take on why this is so worth considering:

When was the last time you really spent the season of Christmas fully wrapped up in the miracle that God himself became human and lived among us, as a human. Can you imagine going from never having to eat to being hungry? Or during Christmas, do we find ourselves more frequently going to church for the sweeping musical emotional energy of cantatas or the time-honored family tradition of attending the Christmas eve service? We send cards that have a baby in a manger, but are our minds clear enough to actually meditate on that mystery? I think that it's easy to reflect on Christ's death and resurrection over Easter weekend or when taking communion. But do we ever really get carried away thinking about the miracle of His birth? We can't worship because we are way too busy with, well, the cult of consumerism during Christmas. Then we justify our lack of self-control in spending as "a tradition of giving gifts started by the Magi." Well, if we are so committed to biblical living, then why is Christmas one of the most godless times of the year? Why do people get trampled to death on Black Friday?

Slow down! Acually spend time with people you love! If you love cooking, then do it with friends and family. If you hate cooking, then go out to eat with people you love! don't do things just because society implies that you must. Rather, act as Christians.

My Suggestions:

One way that I am planning on focusing my worship this Christmas is to take time daily to pray over my attitude. When it gets cold outside and people are stressed running around shopping like crazy people, I pray that I will be an instrument of God's peace and that I will be an encouragement to those around me. At night I want to reflect on the ways that I pointed people to Christ, confess my actions that lead people away from Him and pray that I might do better the next day.


Also, in my focused time of worship, I want to meditate on the implications of God becoming flesh and praise God for His tremendous sacrifice. That way, my individual time of worship will feed into my understanding and praise during corporate worship, enabling me to worship fully, out of a sense of profound amazement, not just obligation.





Well, the point of this note is to encourage you to rethink Christmas. Not only that, though. I also want to release you from thinking that you need to buy me something for Christmas. I want the cycle to break and I will be the first to ask that it stop with me. That being said, I would love to spend Christmas time with you. Give Christmas "presence." So what do you do with the extra money? Give it to people who need it! Missionaries, the persecuted church, refugees, inner city ministries. I could go on, but you can probably think of one or two causes that you have been meaning to donate to, but haven't had enough money. Now you have some extra cash, so spend less, give more, love all!

People of the Basurero

A subject of particular angst for me since I began working at Amextra is the thought that there are people who are defined by their association with garbage. Garbagemen in the US might possibly incur a bit of a stigma... but they always have the opportunity to say that it is just their job, not who they are. And anyway, somebody has to do it!


Here though, the people live in the basurero (garbage dump). It is their livelihood and their life! They make their homes from the garbage. Their community is called La Ciudad Perdida, The Lost City. The buses that travel to the area proclaim that they are headed for "Tiradero," the "Rubbish Dump." Just past Ciudad Labor, the City of Work. It almost sounds like something that should be in allegory, not a real place with real people. Could you imagine if a basurero placed your life? "Oh, yeah, I live in the garbage dump, if you just head down the dirt road there past Work Town you'll see it. You might smell it first."


That thought was depressing to me, but it caused me to reflect on the Christian life. Such close contact with a community centered around refuse made Bible passages dealing with the topic press themselves on my consciousness anew in living odor.

For it seems to me that God has put us apostles on display at the end of the procession, like men condemned to die in the arena. We have been made a spectacle to the whole universe, to angels as well as to men. ¹⁰We are fools for Christ, but you are so wise in Christ! We are weak, but you are strong! You are honored, we are dishonored! ¹¹To this very hour we go hungry and thirsty, we are in rags, we are brutally treated, we are homeless. ¹²We work hard with our own hands. When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure it; ¹³when we are slandered, we answer kindly. Up to this moment we have become the scum of the earth, the refuse of the world. -1 Cor. 4:13

I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Jesus Christ my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish that I might gain Christ, and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ--the righteousness that comes from God and is by faith. Phil. 3:8-9

All of us have become like one who is unclean,
and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags;
we all shrivel up like a leaf,
and like the wind our sins sweep us away. --Is. 64:6

Ok, that's just a brief reflection (that I've been trying to post for about a week...) :-) I hope that it made you think. Stay tuned, because I have a lot more musings that I haven't had a chance to write/post yet.

Resting in God's Faithfulness

A typical American mindset is to want everything to be planned out ahead of time… and then to occur on time. However, the prevailing message of the Bible is to go first, and then to see where God is leading. Abram was told to leave before he was told where he would end up. He was later tested when God told him to sacrifice his promised son, his heir. Instead of wavering, laying other plans, or reminding God that they had made a deal, Abraham simply went where he was told to go and did what he was told to do. So many times God just gives us enough light to see the next step. And American or otherwise, our job is to step out in faith and believe that God is sovereign and knows what He’s doing.

This is on my mind a lot after the retreat because I was just reminded there that the next few days (and certainly the year!) will be very uncertain. I won’t meet my host family or see the house till tomorrow. I meet with my ministry leaders on Monday. There are a lot of variables between here and there, a lot of schedule changes that will take place, a lot of doubts, and a lot of misunderstandings. Just like Abraham had, I’m sure. However, what I know to be true is that I can look back on God’s faithfulness and say with confidence that He knows what He is doing… and that I can safely trust Him with my life, my future, and even something as trivial as my schedule. A week ago at this time I was at our church surrounded in prayer by fellow believers. At that point I only knew three of the 7 Americans with whom I would share my experiences in Mexico this year. But God had been drawing them here for a long time before that, as I found out over the past few days. What sweet times we had testifying to His faithfulness! What joy as we looked back over uncertainties of our past and saw the fingerprints all over them! What strength we drew to face an uncertain next few days.

I know you want updates. You are mostly Americans and that’s the way we’re wired, for better or for worse. However, I don’t have concrete details to share at this point. Instead, rejoice with me over the goodness that God has shown to me in shedding some light on my time here already:

--At the retreat I began to really get to know some quality people (Buena gente, as we say here) and am blessed to be working with them this year. I will have the inbuilt additional fellowship of my roommate Ashley and look forward to common experiences with her.

-- God has provided wonderfully financially for this trip and I am able to focus on the Lord, other people and my ministry while I’m down here, rather than spending my time worrying about funding.

-- God promises to go with us wherever we are, so I can trust Him that He will be with me in this new phase just as He was in the past!

Impressions

If your freshly cooked meals include tantalizing lime spritzed over everything ,

If you fall asleep to the white noise of engines and can hear a full melodic range of car horns at any time of the day,

If your apartment feels like it is experiencing minor earthquake tremor whenever a heavy truck rolls by,

If your sense of sight is delighted by festive colors decking the simplest of storefronts,

If at midnight you are visiting with friends in a tiny restaurant over tacos al pastor,

If people are more important than schedules and chatting over coffee is a sacred hour,

If the pleasant cadence of Spanish can convey meaning that your own native language just can’t verbalize,

If on your first meeting with an hermano or hermana in Christ you feel like you have known them all your life,

If God is doing big things in a big city and you are thrilled to be just a little part of it,

You might be in Mexico City.

I know I am.

Give Me Your Eyes

To those of you who were wondering what "Dame Tus Ojos" meant... of those of you who understood the translation but wanted the thinking behind it, this post is for you!

The inspiration comes from a song by the Christian Latino musician Jesus Adrian Romero. The song (Dame Tus Ojos) translates "Give Me Your Eyes" and reflects the desire that God would so instill in us his own desires and to see the way that He views the world. Here is the song with it's translation. I think it pretty much speaks for itself... but I'll comment a bit more afterwards anyway.

Dame Tus Ojos (Give Me Your Eyes)

Dame tus ojos, quiero ver. (Give me Your eyes, I want to see)

Dame tus palabras, quiero hablar. (Give me Your words, I want to speak)

Dame tu parecer. (Give me Your likeness)

Dame tus pies, yo quiero ir. (Give me Your feet, I want to go)

Dame tus deseos para sentir. (Give me Your desires to feel)

Dame tu parecer. (Give me Your likeness)

PRE-CORO

Dame lo que necesito (Give me whatever I need)

Para ser como tu. (To be like You)

CORO

Dame tu voz, dame tu aliento. (Give me Your voice, Give me Your breath)

Toma mi tiempo, es para ti. (Take my time, It's for You)

Dame el camino que debo seguir. (Give me the path that I should follow)

Dame tus sueños, tus anhelos. (Give me Your dreams, Your longings)

Tus pensamientos, tu sentir. (Your thoughts, Your feelings)

Dame tu vida para vivir. (Give me Your life to live)

Dejame ver lo que tu ves. (Allow me to see what You see)

Dame de tu gracia, tu poder. (Give me Your grace, Your power)

Dame tu corazon. (Give me Your heart)

Dejame ver en tu interior. (Allow me to see inside You)

Para ser cambiado por tu amor. (So that I might be changed by Your love)

Dame tu corazon. (Give me Your heart)

------------

This song (and theme for my blog) is really important to me because it illustrates so well the mindset that I want to have while in Mexico and in ministry in general. It is very easy for me to fall into a rut of loving my own plans and desires too much or of allowing myself to see things from a purely human perspective... and to the casual observer I might seem to be living a decent Christ-pleasing life. However, my goal is not to pass uncensored the tests of the "casual observer," but rather to truly see the world as God sees it and to respond accordingly.

Please pray with me to that end! Dios, dame tus ojos!

If you have Facebook, you can read more of my musings on this song from last summer here: http://www.facebook.com/notes.phpid=141303959&notes_tab=app_2347471856#!/note.phpnote_id=109855012789&comments

It's official, it's in!

Well, everyone, for those of you following my Mexico journey, an giant milestone has been met: My support for the first two months is definatively in... and I am officially cleared to go down on the 20th... just over a week! :-)
Thank you all for your prayer and support! I have been so blessed by the interest you have shown and by knowing that you are praying for me! I would appreciate your prayer in a few different areas:

--Please pray that I would be humble and teachable as God continues to broaden my vision of missions and teach me how to think longer term in missions.

--Please pray for all of the details of packing that I need to finish and just loose ends that need to be wrapped up before I head to Mexico.

--Please pray that in the upheaval of moving to Mexico and a total change of pace that I would remain close to God... and that I would be patient and gracious in the transition.

Thanks so much to all of you for the role you are playing in this process! I could not do this without your support!

Love,
Caro

P.S. If you are interested in supporting me throughout the year either in prayer or financially, let me know!